A Son's First New Pad For Grad School With Tips To Cope For Mom

1. If you have never visited your child's new geographic location do so in the daylight. At night everything looks menacing and you'll be convinced danger lurks behind every corner and over-grown bush. Of course, things could look just as bad in the light of day but your husband can now see your facial expressions and he will instantly know his job is now to include handling you and your over-protective maternal instincts besides driving all over town and moving the boxes. I find this non-verbal delivery to be the most effective way of getting the message across.

2. Open all your boxes at Ikea before you leave the parking lot. Do not wait until you're back at the apartment unless you are very fond of Ikea. By the second time this may sink in. If not, third time's the charm.

3. Plug in all lamps before you leave the only Staples store that carries them that happens to be a half hour away on the freeway.

4. Nothing is made in America except jelly jar drinking glasses found at the Dollar Store. The fact they will be found in an archeological dig centuries from now completely intact will be America's legacy. God Bless America.

5. Your compulsive need and insistence to put in new shelf paper may not be understood by your son at the time but when it's in it will be appreciated.

6. The same can be said for insisting he have extra drinking water stored, extra batteries and candles knowing the campus lies on top of a known and dangerous EQ fault. When he scoffs at the idea of such overkill and mocks that in 5 years he'll give them back unused, I pray to God I will be made to look like a fool.

7. There is still a place where you can get sprouts on your sandwich, dread locks are abundant and pit bulls walk their owners. I would not be surprised if there is an ordinance not allowing cute, cuddly dogs anywhere inside the city limits.

8. One day there will be one more dentist in heaven who took Mr. P.M. after hours on an emergency basis when his crown fell off from eating the sprouted sandwich. The fact he did not charge an arm and a leg to do this will earn him an express pass past St. Peter.

9. CPK added something new to their menu. Food poisoning. Always plan for a wrench to be thrown into your well-oiled machine somewhere.

10. A very hilly campus is for the young.

11. My nightmares stopped after meeting my son's new room mate. He's not a slasher but a very nice guy - a Princeton grad with his bubbly girl friend in check who is an MIT alum (like son1) and will be attending the MBA program at Harvard in two weeks. Yes, I am easily impressed with academic credentials but what truly impressed me was the next morning after their arrival they left a note on a loaf of monkey bread from Schat's bakery saying for my son to share the housewarming gift with his family in case we left before they had a chance to say good-bye to us. I have now added a new pray request that there are duplicate women, like her, out there for both my sons.

In retrospect, I am wondering why I wasn't emotional in saying good-bye on this trip leaving him in an extremely diverse community without a car where being south or west of certain streets would not be a good place to be but I feel good we got so much accomplished in 4 days to help set him up even with the few unexpected bumps along the way. He is where he has chosen to be and he has made these decisions on his own.
This could be part of the reason.
The other part must be exhaustion.

He also had a birthday the last night we were there and although we didn't celebrate as I would have originally liked as son2 was still recovering from the CPK incident from the night before and it was late by the time we stopped for the night, we were able to pick up some PF Chang's located across the street from our hotel where we brought it back to our suite. As the birthday boy was enjoying his slice of The Great Wall of Chocolate that was a make-shift replacement for a home baked cake I noticed a distant gaze.
He looked at me and said,
"It's different being 23. It's not like I'm a kid anymore."

The first apartment, a new career path and a birthday all at once. I guess a revelation is only to be expected when three of your brightest stars align at once and your future appears in their twinkle.